As dusk settles

We can always hope for a better dawn

This year started off busy with usst. The annual school's tradition orientation. It was pretty awesome and it is on quite a large scale. New year was particularly memorable this year... and I can rightly declare it is one of the happiest time of my life even though its short lived.

I won't go into much. But some shit happened in between March to April which is quite a let down. Probably I think I was okay, but I know deep down I'm not. Anyway for those handful of trusted ppl who walked me out of this, thank you. You are my heroes/heroine!

But that was the 1st of my many problems I faced this year. Problems that are new and I have no experience of dealing with. Some are my family problems which was really at a breaking point during September & October.

Stpm was stressful indeed as well. Really will mentally take a toll on you. Now finger crossed that I will get what I needed for further studies. I've had sleepless nights worrying bout it time to time. Grandpa passed away too just before my last paper. It was unexpected, cause I was still planning on visiting him as soon as exam ends.

In many ways, this year, my last year in school ironicly reminds me of my 1st year in secondary school.

As soon as exam ends, some say they are gonna sleep till their heart's content, some say gonna do some gaming, some gonna watch all their movies they've been waiting to watch. Well I was stuck at making a short opening video for my scout gathering. It's not that awesome and all, infact it was full of minor mistakes..LOL. I only realized it when they are trial running it. Well luckily everyone is happy with it.

The gathering that night was phenomenal. It was one of the grandest *if im not wrong* ever since I was form 1. Alot of ppl attended and had fun. It was the 50th anniversary of the founding of my scout troop so alot of old scouts came back.. I was one of them too!! LOL. It was extraordinary in so many ways. Reminds me of form 1 as well.

Things started to brighten up more as December sets in. Probably is due to the holiday mood and all. It was fun serving as one of the photographers for Christmas with Ah Beng 2 drama. The drama itself was nothing short of a complete success, Glory to God! Initially it was full of doubts but in the end the crowd enjoys it and it was awesome. For those who didnt attend, your lost! HAHA. And there will not be another sequel till 2012. For those who come, you might not now it.. but you people really made my day, and many thanks :)

This year was a challenge to me. And I know that most of the time I did not behave at my best. What? Its not like i'm saying i'm a saint that never loose my temper, infact ppl that knows me well knows im hot tempered...in a ridiculous way. But I'm still working on it so that I will be less .. 'volatile'.

On a 2nd note, this year a friend thought me something new. Although he/she might not be aware of this but that person thought me to live life as it comes.

To abstract? Well let me explain in detail. I am a person that plans. Everything I approach with a strategy, *important stuffs*. But sometimes, not everything can be achieved by a strategy alone, a person must learn to follow the flow. My problem was I stick too much to my strategy and thus nt being versatile enough..almost in every aspect of the things I do. But as said im learning to cope with that. Also i approach life with a plan, that by this time I must do this, have this and done that. All this have no good but put on additional stress on me I suppose. This I realized myself that we can't fully plan out our lives, sometimes we should give space for life itself to surprise us... and live life as it goes.

I'm not saying that we should make plans for our lives, infact Long term planning is very important.. im just saying we have to be flexible. When the plan is not working, don't stick to it. Be carefree, but don't be careless.

1st thing im gonna do for 2011 is to go somewhere alone, preferably by the beach.. to cool my head and think things through. Like what i'm gonna do, what i'm gonna study, where i'm heading.. and all. Sounds weird but yeah I kinda need that.

Also. I wish everyone a blessed year ahead. :)

I'm dreaming of a blue sunset

Have you ever see a blue sunset? Well go to mars and you will see one.

If I have all the money in the world .. One of the craziest things i might do is this on Christmas.

p/s: I'm not a fanatic. I just find this pretty amazing.

On a second note.. I went for paintball with usst-ians recently. Funny thing is made me realized i wasnt as physically capable then I used to be .. less then 5mins into the game I was already sitting behind cover gasping for air due to the constant running and duck and cover. 2 girls participated but let me tell you.. Those girls fight like real men! All they did was jst take cover and spam bullets.. enough to send us running for our lives.

Quoted by Zhanming(teammate) when he took cover beside me "It's Meiyee!!(My ex-assistant) It's Meiyee!! *in a shaky scared tone and with bullets whistling beside us*. No I did not exaggerate.. its really like this! LOL

New year is coming. Very pretty soon. Soo ... What now next?

ooo.. also added in some new songs. Enjoy~

Over my head

Over my foot, my pillow, my chocolate waffle. Over you By Daughtry

Wanted to actually post up a long post about my year end conclusion of the whole year. But anyhow bumped on this song in my playlist and I decided to post up this song instead. Hence, another emo-ish post. Bah.

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.

Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
i got over you.

Friends

To those who were there to walk me out of hell, I can't really find anything that come close to repaying your deed. But for now, I can only offer a simple heart felt thank you. It took me long enough to realize that I can't do this alone. 

Random much. I know.

Is there more?

I guess there is nothing more to say any other then Merry Christmas.

Anyway peeps. Merry Christmas and may the God Bless you all :)


And I won't be using the present I received last year for a long long long time.

And may all your Christmases

Be white :)

It is indeed the time of the year again. However for a million reasons this year Christmas would be different. It's part of the growing up process.

Just thinking after this Christmas my next might nt be celebrated at my home town anymore, My next might nt be with the same ppl anymore, And I might never be able to go caroling anymore as well. But yeah I'm thinking too much.

Coming UP!!! AH BENG 2!!!  26th of Dec at SPC. Cya dudes there!! :)

Will post about my scout gathering on the next post .. or maybe afew post later..HAHA. Photos of it is up on facebook.

I'm just saying

That there is more then meets the eye.

I could never fully comprehend why, but almost every time i can be caught off guard even with highest wall i've erected. Maybe it's just me.

I've been twisting and turning,
In a space that's too small.
I've been drawing the line and watching it fall,
You've been closing me in, closing the space in my heart.
Watching us fading and watching it all fall apart.
 

Well I can't explain why it's not enough, Cause I gave it all to you.
And if you leave me now, oh just leave me now.
It's the better thing to do,
It's time to surrender,
It's been to long pretending.
Theres no use in trying,
When the pieces don't fit anymore, Pieces don't fit here anymore.

You pulled me under,
If I had to give in.
Such a beautiful myth,
That's breaking my skin.
Well I'll hide all the bruises,
I'll hide all the damage that's done.
But I show how I'm feeling until all the feeling has gone.
 

Ooh don't missunderstand,
How I feel.
Cause I've tried, yes I've tried.
But still I don't know why, no I don't know why.
I dont know why...... whyyy

This song is a story that I will listen to over and over again

I ought to not think about it anymore. In fact I don't know why I still do think about it even after so long and after so much. But maybe it's just once in a blue moon this storm comes back again. Or maybe the world is catching up to me after running away for so long.

Anyhow. I know I'm not ready for anything at all. I've got much to learn, much to understand, and much to improve. It was never about finding the right one, it's about being the right person. Period.

Tonight is the night the world begins again. There is so much to live for and so much to accomplish in this long holiday. I shall not waste it or procrastinate it away!

Less is more

Alright. This is gonna be a long long long long long long DAMN LONG POST. I warned ya, so don't sue me!!!

On the bright side. There is photos as well :D

Okay alot has happened within this week. Ranging from my childhood's friend birthday to the finish of my exam's..Stpm.

1st off on Sunday night went yumcha wif booyeong and his gf at movenpeak to celebrate his bday and catch up with each other. Took along my dslr to take some pics. Instead .. Junie took it and took most of the pics = =

Love the lighting and the atmosphere it projects.. and matches up with the songs. Nice.

 Both picture taken by Junie. And she got a free cake after taking the photo of the lil indian girl..LOL

 Yeah. The birthday boy and his gf.

Then on Monday evening received some shocking news that grandpa passed away. Was very unexpected.. I was actually planning to pay him a visit right after exams. His health deteriorated sharply 2 months ago. But it's too late now. NewYear is never gonna be the same again.. the same place will never be the same again either.

And Tuesday is really a tough day.. gone trough 2 hard papers and straight to a funeral. It's like softcore suicide.

Then today is THE DAY!!! STPM's LAST DAY. I NEVER THOUGHT.. IT REALLY CAME!!!

 Morning, before entering into the exam hall

Right after exams went over to take a look at the scouts. They are gonna have a gathering this Saturday. And it seems its a very large one. 500plus scouts/guides will be coming. Awesome.

 Guess this picture sure brings back memories

 And this too ;)

 Into a New Dimension

I climbed this to get a better view to snap photos. But right after i climbed up and got down from it my thigh started to have cramps.. wth.

That is all for now. Christmas is coming and I am not planning to do any Christmas shopping cause I'm broke. LOL. Nahh actually im lazy to go shopping :P

Cheerio folks

Largest SLR lens in the world

Information/Images courtesy of google and their respective sites.

Well currently i am highly unmotivated to study. So I decided to go on a wild goose chase looking for the largest lens in the world. Why did i said its a wild goose chase? Cause I will never own one. LOL

Anyhow my search yield interesting results

And i bet.. if you have one.. ppl might misunderstand you as some Explosive-phille tat enjoys mighty explosions and chaotic carnage.

"I meant no harm, its just a camera and its lens"

 "Heyy!! I captured brocali stucked in your mouth.... Half a mile away"

Oh well It's total overkill aint it? What? I meant the camera lens*cough*

Well talking bout overkill.. this should be interesting enough.

 Well I will make an exception and give you the details on this one. There is only 3 in the world And its 5200mm f14 Canon Lens. If you dnt get the numbers dnt bother. You just need to know its very insanely large.

Well .. there is one that looks weird & at the same time i find it funny too.

Largest fish eye lens. 220Degree of capture

Okay. I'm not a camera geek .. it just im bored. HAHA.

Well next post would be about me then .. im lazy to transfer photos recently.

Five heroes

Well I do know this blog has been dedicated to things happening in my life and well, when nothing is happening in life.. frankly there is nothing to say. Besides the occasional emo post.*cough*.

Okay. If you guys don't know.. There is a motor show in KL recently. I really wanted to go, since I have a strong interest in cars ever since I was a kid. But too bad for my exams.. I can't D:

But.. this is why they invented internet for right?!?! :D

As for today. I will be talking bout the 5 new concept cars launched by our country's car manufacture. Proton.

The name of the cars is drawn from the Malay folk tales of the Five heroes, Kasturi, Lekiu, Lekir, Jebat and Tuah. All with a Hang infront etc, Hang Tuah.

 Hang Jebat. A so called collaboration with Mitsubishi's Lancer. Just the front is a little different. But to be honest I like this look more..LOL.

 Hang Kasturi. A face lift of the current proton saga. Well it's about time, the current saga's look is starting to look old. The new saga does look more aggressive.

 Hang Lekir. Needless to say, this is from the Lotus company that Proton has purchased.

 Hang Lekiu. This could be the possible face lift of the current Proton Exora. But I do hope they will still name it Proton Exora.. coz Proton Hang Lekiu does sound pretty lame. Actually all the name mentioned here sounds lame. No offense.(no racism intended)

This final, and my favorite is the Proton Hang Tuah. The possible replacement of the Proton Persona.Well it does have some distinct similarities from Civic and other brand cars of its range.. But this is definitely better then copy semata-mata right? *cough*.

Well. thats for now. I just posted this cause I can't watch tv. fml. HAHA

The rain drizzles the night

Let's not sleep tonight

RAWR

Damn you math

360°

360th post as well!!! :D

45/60. Well it's safe, but definitely not what I aimed for. But given the fact its last minute study.. guess I have to make do with it.. and fingers crossed that I didn't screw up totally on my essay.. else I won't even get a B on General Studies.. leave alone my aim of getting an A.

Anyhow I breathed a sigh of relief cause it was better then I initially expected. I was thinking it would be 30plus only .. cause i was skipping lots of questions when I did the paper. But well, guess I'm just blessed :)

smiling honestly

And Your love is for me
And Your love is for me
And Your love is forever

- True Worshiper's You are my father

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Just like the ones I used to know

Christmas is coming. For some weird out of this world reason, almost every single of my Christmas holds unpleasant memories. Well ..almost.

Just yesterday, Dad made Pizza again.. Which is as awesome as usual :D

And its 11more days to the finishing line. Then I can spend less time here from then on

Her picture

Hope it works

The pages keep turning, I'll mark off each day with a cross
And I'll laugh about all that we've lost
Calendar Girl who is lost to the world
Stay Alive

Be it hell or high water.

The world is shrinking

He said I think I'll go to Boston...
I think I'll start a new life,
I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name,
I'll get out of California, I'm tired of the weather,
I think I'll get a lover and fly her out to Spain...
I think I'll go to Boston,
I think that I'm just tired
I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind...
I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset,
I hear it's nice in the Summer, some snow would be nice... oh yeah.

 -Augustana's Boston

Let's not start over, Let's try for the last time

In someplace where nobody knows me

Where a person will love not for who was, but who is

Where snow will fall during Christmas

 The world is still the same, There's just less in it

-Jack Sparrow

And slowly like sound of drizzling raindrops, the piano keys sooth away the lonely night liberating me from the clutches of insomnia. :)

P/s: This post is UTTER CRAP and RANDOM. Maybe its not afterall. If ur smart enough to see this then you should know the meaning. The long for me to escape. Escape from what exactly.. well I am still trying to figure it out..LOL. "Say Hi if you see this".RAWR. Okay that was random. :P

P/s/s: Thanks to the worst text book in the world, PA text book.

When pieces don't fit

then stop putting it back. Instead, get a new one.

Alright, i know i've said i won't be here till exam's over. Anyhow apparently i am procrastinating cause right now .. I have my dear cpu back with me.. WOOHOO!!!! But it's gonna be gone by saturday D: 

Well aside from that, to summarize this week.. 2 days before chem went to school to meet up awhile with jeff. Also took a glimpse on the preparation of my school's scout gathering.

This just look too familiar. Ahh those days :D

Also took some pictures of the flowers in my school

Well, then the day finally chem where i took my chem test. I was horrible... HORRIBLE!! Its like me eating vegie!! (Fyi- I dislike vegie alot.. but i like salad alot..LOL). Well after that ordeal, i was immediately dragged to a wedding ceremony by mom. Didn't enjoy much .. i was like half dead due to extreme headache .. staying up at that point was a challenge itself.

The married couple

 Our culture, our tradition

The food  was awesome btw.. Facing the fact that i did'nt eat at all the whole day till night.. so yeah my metabolism kicked in and I could be chewing off the table If there is no food.

But then the epic part was that the electricity went off when the dinner is about to over. Well it's at the village area at Tronoh.. so apparently from the villagers it was a normal thing electricity went out. But it was a very bad coincidence it happened during the wedding dinner. Feel bad for the couple actually.

For those scouts that is going through tough times, don't forget

8. A scout smiles and whistles under all circumstances

Well, Half is over, half is left. 

What happens after exam is everyone's guess

But i do know I will certainly have fun!!

Here I am again

Well some pics. And also renewed my playlist ENJOY!!! :D

Most of these songs are responsible of keeping my sanity in check for the exam period. :)

Pictures are up and I shall begone. Time to push ..PUSH!! ARR!! STPM!! CHEM!! PAPER 2!! ACTIVATION ENERGY!! LE'CHATELIAR's PRINCIPLE!! OMG!!!

I can do it. I know i can.

And its the old songs that made me realize, back then who I was and what I've foolishly done. And since I swore, I will make that promise to never take a step back. Forward is what am I gonna look towards to. I'm done.

Failure is an option

Howeve, Giving up is not.

Physics paper 2 is like a big fat slap on my face. What a bitch.

And I with my utmost certainty take claim that I've studied more in the week before exam than I've studied for the past 1 & half years.

 

I'm dead

Time to kick in the contingency plan.

My substitute now for my space age cpu is this dinosour lappy. Well at least it gets the job done :D

Cheerio.

Despite the distance

and I believe despite the differences...

..for the right one, nothing can comes in the way.

P/s: My last post before I unplug for good. 

P/s/s: Junz check ur mail!!!

Take TWO

okay okay. I know i said i abandoned this blog. But i just gotta blog about one of the most important days of my Form 6 life, most memorable one nonetheless :D

Oh new songs too. Btw to view the video press the square on the top left of the player with the world 'video' there. Just for you folk's info.

Well, its none other than the Graduation Ceremony. Well, since this is just pre-U there is no square hats or blue robes. It's just plain school uniform. lol. Entering the hall, a friend of mine did ask me before, did u remember last graduation ceremony we had? Where we told ourselves we won't come back to this school? LOL .. well I never attend my form 5 grad ceremony .. so i guess this is a second chance to experience it. :) 

The very last class of the year. PA class in library.

Oh btw. Something unexpected was the infamous 'Helmi free hair treatment' that i've got. I am so frigging blessed to be the 1st to receive that treatment that day and whats more, its a SURPRISE!! A surprise one to one treatment by a world class hair barber and FREE..what a deal. F.Y.I, the whole paragraph was total sarcasm. You will get what I mean,

It's so damn straight. FML.

well a trip to the barber and I tried to rescue my head. Which turns out not quite successful.

 Oh well, my hair is always the same anyway. lol

And also, the class!

well its all boys. I couldn't find the one with girls. So go facebook to check it out :D

Graduation day, where people do crazy stuffs too..

like, proposing. (this is just an example)

And screwing those guys that gave you a hard time. (in this case, its just for fun)

Some of the greater things only happens in a fraction of a second.

And when you miss it, it's gone forever

Shawty, only one, one, one, I would never be able to send you away

 Bi Rain - One

P/s: One month to go! Cheerio.

Termination Initiated

I ought to be missing till December 16. Or at least December 1. after that I will be back to bring back this site from the realm of the dead. Till then this would be my last post for now.

Well. Enjun introduced this song to me just today. Enjoy.

Its like the Chinese version of Wedding Dress..LOL. Well anything aside from english is awesome at the moment = =" I'm jst so fed up of english song i suppose. HAHA.

The challenge from the start to the end is testing my ability to stay focus. Now, I suppose is time to stay focus. Entertainment, I can live without it. I've tried it before I can do it again. With ease. Time to change. Time to improve. Time to be better. Goal without work is dead, Yet working without a goal is dangerous.I have both now. Time to overdrive myself at a frantic pace.

 Still remember back then when we were still naive?

Good times Good times :D

To the stars, I will take you to

Ayte. Nuff ranting. Cya folks in one month. Cheerio.

I'll be back.

A night of unexpectation

Seriously unexpected. The last thing I figured for last night is meeting friends and having a good time. But somehow felt its very short. Next time, CALL EARLIER

Initially we 1st met at Secret Recipe and had our supper there. But then at around 10plus It closed down and they 'Chased' us away. VERY VERY BAD customer service. BOO!! BOO I SAY!! BOO!!! Still, I like that spaghetti I ordered. So we made opted for a second round at the nearby McD.

Took some photos as well.

The people.

The Gang

 

 Never expect to see him too

Keng&Waisoon had to leave early so thats just left only Me, Hau & Jason. We initially planned on chatting a little while longer beside our cars, till we see this.. 

Jason's car window got smashed

Luckily there is nothing important in it or stolen.. I think. But I suppose the window itself will cost a bloodshed to the wallet.

Oh well. Guess shit like this don't only happen in my school carpark. And shit happens.